In Memory of Ray

A friend of mine died today.

It was totally unexpected. A massive heart attack. His wife, Bonnie found him...called 911, but it was too late.

He was only 51.

His name was Ray Zdankiewicz and he was in the radio business. You can probably guess that with an ethinic name like that he (as most of us radio people do) had an "air name". His was Ray Marshall. Ray and his wife Bonnie were a cute radio couple. She was in sales and he was in programming. He was a talented programmer for sure, but my best memories of the Radio Ray were on the air. He had an amazing voice that shook the foundation when he spoke; and a way of communicating that put a picture in your mind of what he was talking about. He had a gift of creating "theatre of the mind". I recall listening to him once when he was on a music station, promoting an upcoming long stretch of music he was about to play. Most dj's say something milktoast like "more music next". But Ray began one of his "theatre of the mind" bits. He said he had a stack of CD's in front of him. They that were stretching so far across the studio that it was almost like looking at a rolling field of wheat. Going on...and on...shining, shimmering in the sun....as far as you can see...that's how much music I've got to play for you." His analogy got way off track from the songs that were coming up--but I was so lost in the desciption of music...I remember thinking--"I can't punch away now...this will be like listening to 10 CD's track one after another"!

Yeah...he was good on the air, did mornings for much of his career. And he was also good off the air, as a talented programmer. But I know he'd be most proud of his "job" as a husband, father, son and friend. He was a faithful husband who really loved his wife...you could tell they were happy by the way they were together. He was a proud father--so proud of his son John. He was a devoted son. And a good friend to many who knew him.

I had the honor of knowing Ray and Bonnie through work and beyond. When we were all a few years younger, they lived near my late husband and me, so the 4 of us hung out a lot. We went to their house and they to ours. We went camping together. Our kids were young together.

Then Ray was offered a programming job in Lansing, and they've been there for the last 15 years.

Time and life get in the way we sort of lost touch over the years, but when my husband died a few years ago, they came to show their support. I realized then, as I do today, that miles and years melt away with good friends. I'll be heading to Lansing this week to do my best to support Bonnie; as now we're both members of a club that no one wants to join. The young widows club.

And once again I am reminded how precious life is...and how we just don't know when our time is up.

Kiss your spouse. Forgive a hurt. Tell someone you love them.